Therefore the Lord Himself will give you a sign: Listen carefully, the virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and she will call his name Immanuel (God with us).

Isaiah 7:14

Christmas can be very different when your parents are divorced.

NOTE: This may not be the Christmas message you were expecting, or even the one you wanted to read.

In fact, let me clarify up front that this is written squarely for you—the kid, teenager, or young adult who finds yourself split between mom’s house and dad’s house this Christmas.

I clearly remember how awkward and disjointed it felt when half of Christmas was with mom and half was with dad. The shuffle back and forth, the packing and unpacking—it wasn’t what anyone imagined Christmas would be like. For those first few years after our family split, the change wasn’t just emotional but also practical. Both parents were struggling financially, and Christmas mornings weren’t as grandiose as they had felt when we were all together.

But, you know what? There were blessings hidden in those difficult years—tiny, unexpected blessings. I remember one Christmas when we couldn’t afford to buy a tree. Instead, we went into the woods, cut one down, dragged it back home, and decorated it ourselves. Was it a perfect tree? Probably not. But to us, it was beautiful. We decorated it excitedly, imagining it was as grand as any professionally trimmed Fraser Fir. (Cue the Charlie Brown music!)

Looking back, I’m thankful for the time we had—time that both of my parents made sure we had. For all the differences and imperfections, their love for us shone through.

And I see you, the kid who wishes you had more time with one parent this Christmas. Maybe your family’s situation isn’t as balanced, and that hurts. I get it.

May I share some truths that might help ease that hurt, even if just a little? 

• This isn’t your fault. You didn’t cause this situation.
• Your parents love you deeply, even if their actions don’t always reflect it perfectly.
• When you show love to one parent, it doesn’t mean you love the other any less.
• One day, you’ll realize that parents are typically trying their best. They don’t have all the answers, and sometimes they struggle to express their love the way you need—but it’s there.

You are loved. Always.

When the prophet Isaiah spoke to King Ahaz, Judah was in turmoil. The kingdom faced threats from every side, and Ahaz was torn between alliances. Should he trust one kingdom or the other?

Should he rely on his own strength or make a desperate deal for safety? His world was divided, just like yours might feel right now.

Into that fear and uncertainty, God gave a promise:

“The Lord Himself will give you a sign: Listen carefully, the virgin will conceive and give birth to a son, and she will call his name Immanuel (God with us).”

Immanuel: God with us.

The beauty of this prophecy isn’t just that it foretells Jesus’ birth, but that it assures us of God’s presence in the messiest, most divided places of our lives. God didn’t come to be with us when everything was perfect. He came into a broken world, into poverty and political strife, into uncertainty and pain. And He reminds us that we are never alone.

This Christmas, if you’re feeling split, torn, or unsure of where you belong, I hope you’ll take comfort in that name: Immanuel. God is with you. He is with you in the awkwardness, in the financial struggles, in the moments where love feels stretched thin between two households.

And He’s not just present in the quiet moments of pain. He’s present in the small joys too—the tree that’s not quite perfect but still feels magical, the laugh shared over cheap hot chocolate, the excitement you feel when you get in bed on Christmas Eve.

So, as you celebrate this Christmas—whether it’s in one house, two, or somewhere in between—know this: God is with you. You are loved, you are seen, and you are held by the One who came to dwell among us.

The Christ-child born in Bethlehem didn’t come to a world of perfection. He came into a divided, imperfect world to bring hope, peace, and love. That promise, spoken to King Ahaz, is for you too. 

May your Christmas be filled with the quiet assurance that no matter where you are, no matter how your life feels divided, God’s love for you is whole, steady, and unchanging.

Merry Christmas, and may the peace of Immanuel be with you this season and always.

Joey Smith